From Parin: Mum's Funeral Speech Like mum, I am a strong believer in fate and destiny. Her passing away on Ekadashi, on what is an important day for mum and in the Hindu calendar, would have been her decision. This day is dedicated to Lord Vishnu, the God of Protection and the Preservation of Good and I am sure he is taking loving care of her now. More poetically, my new baby daughter Keira Varsha Patel, was due on Sun 17th Feb.... the day after mum actually passed away. However, destiny brought her to mum 3 weeks and 2 days early, which meant mum was able to hold her once in her arms. The resemblance between the 2 is frightening, yet powerful, so my wife Keral and I will ensure we keep her light shining brightly in everything we teach Keira in life. Some of her traits and special characteristics we will remind Keira of and you all might already remember are: ..... Her love of cooking for everyone. Dad's work colleagues will especially be bitterly upset as she was the only woman I know that cooked lunch for their husband's 6-8 work colleagues....however, dad will probably be relieved as the weekly shopping bill for shaak and raasan will drop dramatically now My family will be gutted to never get the opportunity to taste mum's famous vegetarian biryani, and I'm sad to say I never asked her for her secret recipe..... Sometimes it scared me but mum would often press her mini God statue against the tv on the face of an Indian cricket player, even if a loss was inevitable when needing 100 runs off the last over. Her staunch belief was remarkable and her undeniable positivity was quite infectious When it came to the lottery, she was a bit like Del Boy, in Only Fools and Horses, saying....."son, this time next euromillions draw we'll be millionairres. However, this desire was not borne from wanting the money herself, it was simply so she could help others. You won't believe this but even on her dying days in hospital she still made me buy a Euromillions ticket, and said WHEN, not IF, she wins, to buy a big house each for my 2 cousins Payal and Shital Most of you know that mum and a large proportion of her female relatives enjoyed their multi-day toothbrushing of IPCO toothpaste. The founder was a family friend in their village Dharmaj so they were supplied tubes and tubes on tap from a very early age. Due to her recent illness, she surprisingly stopped a few weeks ago and, whilst clearing out her bag last week, it was hilarious when Bhartimasi, her sister, saw a tube and said....."I'll have that"..... She liked her whiskey and ginger ale and I look back with fond memories when she'd always want to add the few drops of ginger ale from the Schweppes bottle herself.....there'd be at least half left so I would end up having the leftover as my own separate drink She was the only woman I've ever seen with the ability to apply lipstick with no mirror and more importantly no smudges! I know dad's not going to miss her every 6 week haircuts at an eye-watering £40 each time and that was only at the local hairdressers where most clients were pensioners Her stubborn insistence on wearing high heels and wanting to be the first on the dance floor, even with only half a working knee.... Her recent obsession with Indian serials and her defensive nature, attacking me for not being Indian enough when I'd criticise the story line, random sound effects or production. Keral and I constantly invited her over to our home but she insisted she'd only come over if we would subscribe to Indian channels just for her. Her empathy towards people was profound and eternal. An example is she'd always have a go at me or dad and call us tight if we only gave the pizza delivery man a £1 tip. Also, in restaurants, she would shout at dad and tell him to "revah dher neh" (leave him alone) to the waiter even if the food was ice cold or he'd got our order mixed up. She didn't like to see people suffer. The lasting memory I will have is..... Even on the day before she passed away when I knew she didn't have long left to live and I didn't want to be strong anymore so I broke down and i told her how much I was going to miss her. She mustered enough energy to lift her hand and support my chin and she said "don't cry, be strong, I'm getting better". This epitomizes her character in selflessly thinking about other people and being mentally invincible. Let's all use these traits as a lasting legacy. Let's all have a bit of Varsha in us, think about other people and be as strong as her - that will put a smile on her face Thanks and Jai Shree Krishna xx